Sweet Ride

This ad makes it all clear why my parents fell prey to a blue and cream beauty with Naugahyde seats, windows that only opened by popping a latch to expose a 3 inch gap for fresh air and double passenger doors that resulted in several amateur attempts at limb amputation. This was what i learned to drive on. Best moment of my learning permit was cruising around the suburbs with my mom and we are being followed by some sort of sedan car. My mom makes me pull over and all 5 feet of her goes to confront whoever had been following us for ten minutes. Turns out is was some shleppy housewife concerned that we were casing the area for burglaries. CHuh as if! Our van had a good 6 extra standard windows before it qualified as a rape-mobile.

Only a van of such majesty and prestige could possibly top the family car before it. The mysterious and swift AMC Hornet (in light blue as shown no less)

While wikipedia points out that the hornet was the first car to have a luxury trim package by a fashion designer, the only custom feature ours had was a broken heater that blasted out by the feet. Was pure delight after being picked up from swim practice and chauffeured home to whatever hamburger meat meal my mother had prepared with love and cauliflower for us.

After some sort of engine part broke the family hornet was sold to a neighbor for $1. My dad was proud of his 75 cent profit.